Xavier Samuel

Some (ever changing) Thoughts: Adore (2013)

Adore-headerI’ve just finished watching Adore (aka. Two Mothers) for the umpteenth time (trailer at the end). And, as always, my thoughts on this change. Don’t you just love movies that make you think? Make you question? Make you come to different opinions each time?

Once again…I’m pondering the thought of this mother-having-a-relationship-with-her-best-friend’s-son-and-vice-versa. Hmmm….

Oh, before I go on, best I tell you what this movie is about. We have best friends (since childhood) Roz (Robin Wright) and Lil (Naomi Watts) who now have, almost, adult sons. They too are best friends as well as neighbours living on the beautiful coast of Australia. And somehow, it comes out that each son has feelings (beyond just those “normal” of a guy to his friend’s mother) for the other’s mother. Seemingly this has been the case for a while but it is only acted upon now (so that we have a movie, of course). What results is a very strange situation. And that is where my thoughts keep changing…

…so, while I don’t judge (and please don’t judge my thoughts here) people on their preferences in relationship and the age-gap (if it works, that’s fantastic) that comes with some of them, during this viewing it has kicked in that at the beginning of these relationships the sons are barely out of their teens (18/19 years old). And their mothers well into their 40s, if not more. So, for some reason, this has now made a difference on how I feel. In fact, Roz even says what I tend to agree with…that they as mothers should allow their sons to have girlfriends. Because, let’s face it, Roz and Lil are lovers, not girlfriends, to Ian (Xavier Samuel) and Tom (James Frecheville). She might have a point: There should be that option for the guys to experience their teens and how it is to fall in love then. Teenage love is different to that one later in life. They shouldn’t be pulled into this type of toxic  relationship just yet. Yes, much later in life, then fine, let them feel free to make up their own mind. Or…is love oblivious to age? Even for teens?

adore-film

And yet again, I’m wondering…are they already men enough at this stage to decide on the relationships they want to pursue? After all, a few years later, they both meet girls their age and as much as they feel they have to follow the “norm”, things just don’t work out. What point is there if they aren’t happy?

Ultimately, I guess they all need to make up their own minds but the hard part is watching them pull down those outside of their circle of four. The hurt they cause. You’ll wonder who is to blame for it all. Was it all necessary? Ian asks “why can’t you leave things as they are?”. Even though, at some point as a viewer there’s a feeling that they should just have followed their hearts all along. Or not. Gosh, I don’t know anymore!

Let’s not even get started on the mothers…is it love? Is it lust? Or just a means of confirming that they still have what it takes to be attractive? Lil could have the attention of a man her age yet she is not interested. Granted, she turns him down (multiple times) even before the relationship with Tom starts. Next thought is if they (Tom and Lil) get things going purely because Roz and Ian do so or would they have done so eventually regardless?

This movie throws so many questions out there. Here are my thoughts from a previous post (Adore…Friendship on a different level). At the end of it all, right or wrong, I will watch this one again despite the negative reviews it received. It isn’t a feel-good movie, but it is good. And a thought-provoking one leaving you with the image below together with thoughts on what the situation is from here on out (quite different from the similar image of the poster at the start of this post, which is taken from early in the story):

Adore

Here’s the trailer (not for sensitive viewers due to nature of some content):

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Adore…Friendship on a different level…

Adore (2013) aka Two Mothers aka Adoration (based on the novel The Grandmothers by Doris Lessing) is uncomfortable and unconventional and pretty good.

Let me introduce Lil and Roz: They are neighbours and since girlhood, have been very close friends. That friendship continues to the present day where they are mothers to adult sons, who likewise, are best friends.What’s the problem you ask? So, uhm, there isn’t really a problem as such…it’s just…well, to many a viewer the situation that unfolds becomes awkward, yet totally absorbing. You see, one simmering summer, emotions can no longer be suppressed and a new set of “friendships” are started (or, rather, brought into the open). Lil‘s (Naomi Watts) son Ian (Xavier Samuel) acts upon his feelings for Roz (Robin Wright) which in turn triggers Tom (James Frecheville) and Lil‘s relationship. Being friends, the women discuss the line they have crossed and agree that they will never repeat what has happened. But, obviously (otherwise there wouldn’t be a story), things are not so clear-cut and simple. How this all unfolds is up to you to find out.

Initially, I felt very uncomfortable watching this movie and kept looking around feeling guilty. At the same time, I was intrigued, finding myself more and more engrossed (and less and less guilty) while starting to feel sympathetic towards the two couples. I could never shake the feeling that it was so wrong yet it got me thinking. Is it really that wrong? The mothers are, after all, friends and not related (as is true of the sons). I think the fact that these are mothers (and best friends) and their respective sons is where the questions are raised. Would it be different if the mothers and sons had not known each other and met in a “more conventional” way? Shouldn’t the mothers be more responsible (granted, Roz does try)? Is it really true love when a man falls for his mother’s friend/his friend’s mother? I’ll leave these up to you to ponder.

While there has been criticism around the acting (or lack of), I quite enjoy the feeling I get of not watching a movie but rather a snippet of people’s lives. The understated performances effectively portray that this is life. As it comes. That they are not putting on a show.

Filmed along the stunning coast of New South Wales, Australia, and directed by Anne Fontaine, it also stars Ben Mendelsohn as Roz‘s husband (as I said, things aren’t so straight forward). Here’s something different. Something definitely not mainstream. It will give you an unconventional love story (or stories) showing the love of friends, the love of parents, the love of lovers, true love, faked love, the works. As tensions rise, relationships are challenged and people are hurt. One thing’s for sure: things can never go back to what they were. You will definitely remember this one.

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